March 20th - 10 days old

Today we had a few downs, but mostly ups! Most of Sadie's numbers look great at this point. The only things we are worried about at this point are her respiratory rate, her lungs and her white blood cell count. Her respiratory rate is very fast at this point, due to the dampness in her lungs. She also has an elevated white blood cell count, which points to signs of infection. So, the doctors order another blood culture as well as a urine culture. The last cultures had no growth, but they want to figure out why her white blood cell count is high. For her head ultrasound, we got good results in that there were "no significant changes." Tomorrow, she will have a renal ultrasound to recheck her kidneys. When I spoke with cardiology today, they informed me that she is "penciled in" for surgery on Wednesday but they will only do it IF she is completely healthy. We are praying that she will be! She did have a rough morning because her arterial line closed up and they had to prick her five times before they were able to get another successful line in. They did give her some pain medication towards the end to help her with the pain. Today was sad too, as I learned that the little girl I talked about yesterday passed away. I can not imagine what the family is going through, but can only say that we must keep praying for them as I know they are hurting.

Verses for the Day:
"I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1: 3-6
I read all the way through verse 11 to Sadie today and was able to grasp a few new concepts from this.

1. I need to pray with joy. So many times, in the middle of the night usually, my prayers bring me to tears. Now I know that crying is good and beneficial but it is a wonderful thing to experience the joy of the Lord too. I know that I will experience pain, but I must celebrate in my prayers as well. So many times, I get caught up in the negative and forget to focus on the positive. This is why I write out my praises. So that I can see the good things that are happening!

2. Paul had confidence that the Lord would complete his good work in the Christians at Philippi. I know that the Lord will complete his good work in Sadie too! It may not be in the way I would choose or the way that seems the most obvious, but I know that he will complete his good work. I must trust that, believe that and hold on to that in times of fear. Seeing the other family lose their baby was so hard, but knowing that child is with the Lord brings me hope. He completed his work in that sweet girl in a way that was painful for those left behind, but glorious for her. I do not know how anyone could face death without that knowledge, but I am privileged enough to have that knowledge. More than anything, I want Sadie to live a long, full life and fall in love with Jesus here on earth. I would love for her to be able to share her story and use it to glorify His name, but I do not know if that is His plan.

3. Verses seven through eight talk about why Paul feels this way about the Christians at Philippi. He talks about how he has them in his heart and how they share God's grace with him. Sadie is definitely in my heart and I know she is in so many of yours too. What a beautiful thing to know how many people already love my sweet Sadie! And to know how many of you are praying for her daily. Thank you for this as this brings me joy. We also share God's grace with her. Through this time, I have felt God's grace in ways that I did not know were possible. In times of sheer terror and fear, He has been there. In times of small and big miracles, He has been there. Not because of anything I have done, but because He loves me. What a beautiful and miraculous gift! His grace is sufficient for me!

4. Finally, verses nine through eleven talk about his wishes for the people. I too share these wishes for Sadie (and Kinsley)! I want both of my daughters to grow in love for others and Christ, I want them both to have the gift of discernment, so that they can avoid senseless traps that we often fall into. I want them both to have the gift of righteousness through Christ. What a wonderful gift, we can be made right because of His sacrifice on the cross. This acknowledges that they do not have to be perfect, they just have to be His!

Praises for the Day:
1. Sadie's lactate levels have dropped back down. (This means her heart is not overworking itself anymore)
2. Her platelet count has risen to a great level without the addition of any blood products today. (Her platelets have been low- probably because of the infection breaking up her blood cells, but the rise shows that she is doing much better)
3. Her urine has been blood free for almost 48 hours.
4. Her blood culture, eye culture and spinal tap still show no growth!
5. Her head ultrasound showed no significant changes!

Prayer Requests for the Day:
1. We are penciled in for surgery next Wednesday! Pray that her infection clears up and all of her vitals stabilize so that we can have surgery!
2. They are sending out new blood and urine cultures- pray they have no growth.
3. Continued prayer for her lungs as they are still getting too much blood and it is making her respiratory rate too high. Pray that the medicines they are giving her for this work and that she does not have to be intubated again.
4. Sadie has a renal ultrasound tomorrow, pray for good results!
5. Pray for the family that lost their sweet little girl last night.

Love you all!

Sadie with three of my favorite nurses: Laura, Aimee and Heather! I was so blessed to have them all. I am slightly nervous as they are all off until Monday! Please come back soon.

Sadie with Fred (the amazing Chaplain for Cardio kids), Brittany (the best cardio ultrasound tech ever) and me. Love them!